Wings and Beyond Read online

  Mandy ran for the phone and almost snatched it from Iris’s hand. “Lee! I’m so glad you called. I’m going to come out to see you this coming weekend—wait a minute. Did Grandma and Grandpa finally break down and get a phone installed?”

  “Nope! I doubt if they ever will. I called to let you know that I’m not living with them anymore. I’m calling from Daddy’s house.” Lee’s voice was excited and breathless.

  “What?” Mandy felt her knees tremble and she pulled out the desk chair and sat down. “What are you doing in Indianapolis?” She felt as if her lungs weren’t filling with oxygen and her head began to spin.

  “I’m here because I got tired of Grandpa whoopin' up on me all the time. I was helping him nail loose boards on the house and I wasn’t holding one just right, so he hit me in the head with a hammer and knocked me out. Well—”

  Mandy interrupted. “He—he hit you with a hammer?” she asked, her mouth going dry. “Did—did Daddy come get you?”

  “Nope! The next morning I waited for Grandpa to head for the field and for Grandma to go out to milk the cows, then I grabbed some clothes, stuffed them in a sack, stole two-dollars of change from the cookie jar, then I took off. I hitched to Indianapolis. It only took me three hitches. When I got here I found a phone booth and called Daddy and he came and picked me up.”

  Mandy couldn’t seem to find her tongue. She held the phone and felt tears sting her eyes. Her mind was about to travel to her special place when she heard Lee say, “Do you want to talk to Daddy?”

  Mandy swallowed, hard. “Nah. I don’t think I’ve got anything to say to him. Just tell him that I love him. My heart still hurts too badly to talk to him right now.” Mandy wiped tears that were streaming down her face. I really would like to hear his voice, just one more time. But I’m not going to be a cream puff and give in.

  “Okay, Sis. He said you probably wouldn’t. He said to tell you that he loves you and when you’re eighteen, he’s gonna come find you.”

  “He did? Well, I—” Mandy’s voice shut off.

  “Oh, did you know that Aunt Marcy moved out to California?” Lee asked.

  “Yeah, I know. I got to tell her and Uncle Vinnie bye one Saturday when I went to see Mammaw and Pappaw. They were packed up and were heading out the next day.”

  “I haven’t seen Mammaw and Pappaw or any of our aunts and uncles the whole seven years that I was with Grandpa and Grandma. They didn’t make the trip all the way into Bon Harbor very often, and when they did, they were in a hurry to get business taken care of and they never would take me by to see anybody. My whole family is strangers to me. I saw Don, once. He came out to see us when he was a senior in high school. He’s a stranger to me too. You’re the only one that I still know.”

  “I know what you mean, Lee. I see some of the family from time to time, but Don moved away a year ago. Nothing and nobody are the same as they used to be when we were little. Back before Daddy left us and took up with Ellie. After that it was like Mama and us four kids didn’t matter anymore.”

  “Er, Sis. Daddy is really sorry about all that now, but like he said, he’s was kinda in a trap. But I don’t want to talk about all that. And, er, I guess I need to go. This call is costing Daddy a lot of money. I’ll call again when I can. Love ya, Sis.”

  “I love you too, Lee. Please call me every chance you get.”

  “I will. Bye, Sis.”

  Mandy wasn’t sure she had spoken her words aloud as she uttered, “Bye, Lee.” She dropped the receiver and dropped her head on the desk. Her body shook with sobs. I’ll never see Lee again. I’ve lost both of my brothers again. There’s too many miles between us. She wiped her eyes. I hate you, God. You just keep taking everybody that I love away from me. And here I am, back with the Hodges. Why don’t you just let me die? I’ve got nothing to live for!

  Iris walked over to Mandy. “Honey, what’s wrong? Is Lee okay?” She placed her hand on Mandy’s back and tenderly rubbed up and down.

  Mandy raised her head and wiped her eyes. “He’s fine. He’s back in Indianapolis,” Mandy answered in a stoic tone. She wasn’t sure if her heart was still beating, if she was having a nightmare, or if she had dropped over dead. She was numb to her core.

  Mandy vaguely heard Iris say, “Well, honey, if that’s where he thinks he’ll be happy then just be happy for him. How old is he now?”

  Mandy shook her head and willed herself to stay in reality. “He’s fourteen. He’ll be fifteen in October. I guess he is old enough to take care of himself now.”

  Iris shook her head, “My, my. I can’t believe Lee is almost fifteen. And you’ll be seventeen in November. It seems like only yesterday that I brought that ten-year-old little girl home with me. Now look at you. Children just grow up too fast.”

  And you treat me as if I’m still ten. Let me grow up already! “I’ll finish the dishes,” Mandy said.

  “That’s okay, honey. I know you’re upset. Why don’t you go practice your music? I’ll finish the dishes. Or you might want to go out and see what your father is doing. He misses you, and—”

  Mandy cut Iris off. “I don’t feel like practicing music, and I don’t care to be with—Dad. I’ve already told you that I’ll never call him Father again. I won’t change my mind!” Mandy stood and faced Iris, her fists balled tightly.

  Iris shook her head. “You can be so stubborn, Amanda. It’s like you enjoy tormenting me. You know I don’t like—”

  Before Mandy could stop Nikko, she was speaking. “You don’t like anything I say, anything I do, what else is new? I’ll never please you and if you want to talk about torture, well, let me tell you—”

  Iris broke down in tears again, her tic worse than ever. “Whatever have I done to deserve this? I’ve been the best mother that I know how to be.”

  Mandy made Nikko be quiet. “I’m going to my bedroom,” Mandy said.

  Iris didn’t answer.

  A week went by and Otis started talking with Mandy at mealtime. He actually seemed to be glad that her chair wasn’t empty. His smile gave him away, but she knew that he’d never admit it. Otis never said he was sorry about anything and she knew he’d never apologize for his harsh words either.

  Mandy had finished everything on her plate except for a few green peas. She said, “Dad, please pass the potatoes.”

  Otis picked up the bowl, narrowed his eyes and said, “Dad, huh.”

  Mandy cleared her throat. “Yes, I like the sound of that better.”

  Otis chuckled. “I like it too. Father does sound a bit too formal.”

  Iris said, “I don’t like the sound of it. And don’t pass her the potatoes before she finishes her peas.”

  “I need some potatoes to kill the taste of the peas!”

  Otis chuckled again as she took the bowl. “I know what you mean. I don’t like the taste of peas either, but we need to eat them because they’re healthy. And you know we have to eat what your mother cooks.”

  Mandy took the bowl just as Iris threw her hands in the air and cried, “I just give up!”

  Mandy froze. Should she spoon a few potatoes? Nikko said, stop being a wuss and take the potatoes! Mandy took one potato and quickly set the bowl back down.

  Mandy knew she had won some sort of contest between them, but she wasn’t sure what it was. And what was wrong with Otis? He agreed with her, and that had never happened before, and he went against Iris. Mandy was puzzled but glad that for the first time in her life, someone stood up for her, even if it was Otis.

  Mandy was happy when Monday morning finally arrived. “The first day of our junior year, Nikko,” she whispered.

  The first weeks of school were so different than the past two years. Being a junior seemed to carry prestige. Several boys had asked Mandy out and she missed Donnie since he had graduated and left for college, but the other boys were handsome and she was flattered by the attention. However, when she asked Iris if she could go out on dates, Iris always said, “No! You won’t be allowed to date.
You can’t be trusted. Your father and I had this discussion before I came to get you and bring you back home.”

  I wish to hell you hadn’t brought me back here! Nikko silently said.

  During basketball season, Iris took Mandy to the games and stayed with her. Iris actually seemed to enjoy watching the ballgames and Mandy noticed that Patsy and Shelly were always sitting together. They’d wave, but they didn’t come over and talk with her. I guess you two are buddies now. I really can’t blame you. Well, at least you still call from time to time, Patsy. I guess that’s all I can expect. She choked back her tears.

  When it was half time, Mandy always needed to use the restroom. Iris was by her side all the way down the hall. The boys would try to start a conversation with Mandy as she headed toward the restroom, but Iris would step between them and say, “Amanda, get your business taken care of then get back in the gym. They’ll be no stopping and flirting in the hallway!” Then she’d give the boys a warning look.

  Mandy’s face would turn red and she wanted to die on the spot. She often wondered if humiliation could kill a person, and at times, she hoped it would.

  One night she went to bed after coming home from a ballgame and as she lay in darkness, she willed Mama and Evan’s spirits to come to her. They didn’t come. It was then she realized that nothing out of the ordinary had happened for almost a year.

  The only thing unnatural in her world was Otis and Iris Hodge.

  Another year slowly passed, and more hatred built in Mandy’s young soul.

  Chapter Eleven

  Mandy was getting dressed for her first day of senior year in high school. She gazed into the mirror and Nikko looked back, a smile on her oval face. She saw a young woman, well-proportioned with firm breasts and slender body and a head of hair that was copper colored with highlights of brilliant red.

  We are beautiful, are we not? said Nikko.

  “We finally made it. This is our last year of high school. It’s been a long four years. If we get through this year, then things will change. We’ll be off to college and maybe we’ll have some fun. Of course, Mother and Dad will be coming for weekend visits to make sure we’re dressing properly and they’ll make sure that no boys are around.”

  Nikko smiled. Yeah, but they’ll come on Saturdays. We’ll have Friday and Saturday nights and Sunday to have fun, going out with boys and going to parties. And I’m sure we’ll have plenty of boy time during the week, too. And just think how much fun we’ll have with our roommates. We’ll finally have girlfriends to share secrets with and other things that girlfriends do together. And no curfew! Hang on. Get through this year, the coming summer, then we’ll enter a brand new world.

  “Amanda,” Iris called from the bottom of the staircase. “Breakfast is on the table. Don’t dilly-dally.”

  “Same ol’ speech,” Mandy said, then waved at Nikko.

  Mandy was delighted when Patsy and Shelly sat beside her in the gym the second morning before the first bell rang for class. And they ate lunch with her. The students had an hour break for lunch and after they had eaten, they gathered in the gym. There was a jukebox against the far wall, just to the entrance of the boy’s locker room. The students played the jukebox, then went to the middle of the gym floor and danced.

  Mandy watched the students when they did the jitterbug, or some students called it the Bee Bop. Her feet were itching to dance and she was sure she could do all the steps. After the first three days of school, the boys started asking her to dance. When one dance was over, another boy was ready to dance with her. Mandy danced the entire thirty-minutes before the bell rang for classes, and she felt like a princess.

  The first six weeks of her senior year was going great, or as great as it could be. At least she had her two best friends back if only during school hours. And she danced every day and for the first time in her life, she was happy, and it showed. Her cheeks took on a rosy glow, and she smiled more often, her bow shaped lips turned up in smiles and her eyes sparkled like stars in the moonlight.

  The third week of October, Patsy told Mandy she was having a Halloween party at her house and she’d be getting an invitation in the mail. “Maybe if you get a formal invitation, Mrs. Hodge will let you come,” Patsy said. “And Daddy put a jukebox in the basement. All you have to do is push a number. No money is necessary. We can dance all night!” Patsy was so excited she clapped her hands together.

  “I doubt if a formal invitation will make any difference, but I sure hope and pray that I can come. A jukebox is perfect! I love to dance. I won’t get my hopes up though. I learned not to hope for much, many years ago,” Mandy answered. “But thank you so much for inviting me.”

  Mandy went to the mailbox the following Saturday, her fingers crossed, and saw the envelope that was addressed to her. Her heart bounced with joy as she ran inside the house where, with shaking fingers, she ripped the envelope open and sure enough, it was a formal invitation.

  I know what the answer will be, but I’ll show it to Mother. She’ll run it past Dad then. “Stop getting your hopes up,” she mumbled, stuffing the small envelope into her back jeans pocket. I’ll hand it to them at lunch. That way they can both say no at the same time. But her mind would not be still as she thought of the party.

  Otis came in for lunch, and Mandy felt a grip of blackness squeeze her soul. Her stomach rolled into knots as she looked at him. Even though he had treated her well since she came back, she didn’t trust him. She could feel a storm brewing inside of him and sometimes when he looked at her, his eyes turned to steel. Mandy felt her guts tighten. God, just once, please answer a small prayer. She took her seat at the table, bowed her head and Otis said the blessing.

  She whispered, “Amen,” with Otis and Iris. She waited until all the food had been passed, then she pulled the invitation from her back pocket. “This came in the mail for me today,” she softly said as she handed the envelope to Iris.

  Iris read it aloud, folded it, then looked toward Otis. “What do you think?”

  Mandy held her breath. Please, please, she silently begged.

  “Well, Iris, she’s going to be eighteen, next month. So I guess she’s old enough and I hope responsible enough to go to a party and act like a lady.” He looked at Mandy. “Will it be chaperoned?”

  “I’m sure Patsy’s parents will be there,” Mandy answered, her palms sweating and her eyes big and round.

  “Then you can go. But you better be home by eleven o’clock. I don’t care if the invitation does say from eight to twelve. After midnight is not a decent hour to be coming home.”

  Iris looked at Mandy and sternly said, “It might be a Halloween party, but you won’t be going in a costume, as the invitation suggests. I’ve never allowed you to dress up in a costume and go trick or treating. I don’t believe in it. It’s like witchcraft! If that’s expecting too much, then you won’t be going.”

  “I don’t care about a costume. I just want to go to the party. We’ll probably bob for apples in a big tub.”

  “That sounds like fun. You may go then,” Iris answered with a smile.

  She couldn’t believe it! Her jailers were telling her she could go, and she wasn’t going to wait around for them to change their minds. She was going to call Patsy right now!

  “Oh, thank you! Can—er—I mean, may I call Patsy and tell her I can come?”

  Iris pursed her lips as if she had just taken a bite of a persimmon. “That’s what R.S.V.P. means. You may call her as soon as you finish lunch and help clean up the kitchen.”

  You weren’t expecting Dad to give me permission, were you? And you’re going to make me wait to call Patsy. The rest of lunch was eaten in silence, but Mandy’s heart was pounding with joy.

  After the kitchen was cleaned up, Mandy called Patsy and accepted the invitation. Then she asked Iris if she could call Shelly.

  Iris nodded her head, yes, but she didn’t seem to be too happy with the situation.

  Mandy was so excited her fingers trembled
as she dialed Shelly’s number. Iris stood close by, listening to Mandy’s end of the conversation.

  “Shelly, I have permission to go to Patsy’s Halloween party. Are you going?”

  “Why, of course I’m going. I’ll pick you up and we’ll head out a little early. That’s if you’re allowed to ride with me,” Shelly answered.

  That’ll be a big no, Mandy thought, but she said, “Hold on a minute.” She covered the mouthpiece with her hand. “Mother, Shelly said I could ride with her to the party.” She held her breath.

  “I guess that’ll be alright,” Iris answered, shaking her head and heading toward the back door as if she wanted to run outside and cry.

  “She said yes! I can’t believe this. But you know I have to be home at—”

  “Oh, good grief! You mean you still have to be home by eleven? The party isn’t over until twelve. I’ll have to leave early and bring you home. Nobody has to be home before midnight. Jeez!”

  “Forget it, Shelly. I don’t want to ruin your night. I just won’t go.”

  Mandy was about to hang up when she heard Shelly say, “No, I’ll pick you up. I didn’t mean to get sharp. I don’t have a date and I might be ready to come home by then anyway. And I’m on my period and I’m grouchy. I’ll pick you up next Friday.”

  Mandy felt tears welling as she softly said, “Thank you, Shelly. And if you decide you don’t want to leave that early after the party starts, I’ll just call Mother. She always waits up for me anyway, and she’ll come get me.”

  “We’ll worry about that come Friday,” Shelly said. “Sorry I got my nose out of joint. See you later.”

  “Okay, see you, Friday. Thanks again. Bye.” Mandy hung up the phone and anger was bubbling inside her guts because she would have to leave before anybody else, but she was grateful that she was finally allowed to go to a party and be with her peers after a year of being house bound. We got a one-night pass from the Big House, she said to Nikko.